Facilitated Discussions
There are topics about which we really want to dive deep. So, we have scheduled a series of topics for which we will have facilitated discussions. Each has a prescribed time and date, and one of the co-founders will facilitate each topic. We believe we have a lot to learn from each other. Check out the discussions we have scheduled and put them on your calendar.
Scheduled Discussions
My To-Do List is Boring Me Silly:
May 4, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
Did the first few months of retirement quickly fill with all the things on your to-do list, all the undertakings you just didn’t have time to do when you were working. You finally had time to be with old friends, clean out your closets, plan your garden, catch up on your reading and all the other things on our lists. Did you feel as if you were on vacation and loving your new-found freedom? But now you are realizing that you have a long life ahead of you and you need more. Are you trying to find your rhythm in retirement? Are you trying to productive and purposeful rather than just staying busy? Let’s spend some time talking with the members of our community, and see what they have done to find some structure and satisfying flow to the day.
Do I Want My Job Back????
June 1, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
Are you wondering, how in the world did I become a retired person? Where is my job, my colleagues, my packed calendar and my intellectual challenge? Are you one of the retirees who is seriously wondering if you made a mistake by leaving your career and you are yearning for more productive days. Is there any way to turn back? Is this real, did you make a mistake or did you neglect to make a plan to substitute for the rich environment of work? Let’s talk about this—I think it crosses everyone’s mind at some point, so let’s find out how everyone is dealing with this. Has anyone gotten their old job back and how did that work out?
Plastic Surgery—Yes, No or Who is Asking?
July 13, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
Plastic surgery is a funny topic. Some people consider any work done to be a big secret. Others talk about it openly and still others think it is a betrayal of our feminist roots. The way we look is intensely personal and some people believe they feel as young as they look and others believe that the outside wrapper has nothing to do with feeling and acting young. Social media has plenty to say about the topic and if the plastic surgery goes wrong, there is no mercy. Why are we so judgmental? Why is it so hard to look old in this society? Why are the role models on stage and screen still so beautiful? What do you think about this topic? If you knew it would be successful plastic surgery, would you do it? Do you think plastic surgery just perpetuates women as only a sexual being? Let’s talk about it.
Retirement Surprises—I Just Didn’t Expect This!
August 10, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
We generally have a picture of what our retirement will be like and who we will be in retirement. Since plans rarely unfurl exactly as we plan them, we are guessing that there have been some surprises as you transition away from your career. We have heard women talk about the sheer joy of freedom and others lament the boredom. Some women have been surprised by how much they miss the job they couldn’t wait to get away from. Others say, they can’t believe they used to have time for a full-time job given how busy they are now. Some say the days are long or friendships have waned, while others are surprised by how hard it is to start something new. Some are thrilled with the family time, others think it is just too much. What has surprised you in retirement and how can you help others prepare for one of the biggest transitions of their lives. Let’s share. Lost the date we picked.
Past Discussions
I Want to Have Purpose And Do Something Different.
January 16, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
This is a common refrain; I want to use my hard-fought skills, but I want to use them differently. Do you want to work for compensation or give back to your community? Whether you want your avocation to become your new “work” or you just want something rewarding but less demanding of your time and mind-share, how do you go about making choices that make sense for you? How do you figure out what is the best way to spend your time and refashion your skills and competencies, that were so well defined for your career, into doing that which interests you now? This discussion will invite you to share your deferred dreams in a judgment-proof environment and share ideas about how others are moving forward, making decisions and taking risks.
Share Your Biggest Concerns about Life After Your Career—Let’s Talk for Real.
November 21, 2019. 7:00 pm EST
We want to dive deep into our members’ concerns and thoughts about the transition to retirement. Sharing your personal issues, the strategies you have tried and the psychological barriers you have faced, should begin the robust dialogue that we believe will be the life blood of DefyingGravity.life. This will also allow you to begin to get to know one another and see who has shared interests and concerns.
Watch Out for Your Family and Community—They are Coming For You
December 16, 2019, 7:00 pm EST
We have heard from too many accomplished women, that the moment they retire, they find that others have expectations about how they should spend their time. Whether a husband or partner, expects some version of a 1950’s housewife, or your children see an unpaid nanny or community charities see a new volunteer, it can be quite dismaying. Once your family and your larger community recognizes that you now have that precious commodity of time, they may try and dictate how they think you should spend it. We then begin to question ourselves and our motives—why shouldn’t I help my son or church if I have the time, even if your vision of retirement was entirely different, and once again we defer our dreams. These kinds of demands on your time also provide you with that allusion that you are busy, busy, busy—but do you have the purpose and sense of accomplishment, and once again, the time, that you deserve?
Were They Work Friends or Friends?
March 2, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
Many women have made close relationships with colleagues that they only see in the workplace. For years you have heard about their aging parents, loving husband, unruly children and so much more. You were there for every momentous occasion, good and bad. You went on numerous business trips , and waited together for hours at airports. Now you try to see these associates out of the workplace and you are listening to stories about your replacement and events about which you are no longer a part. And, you haven’t totally replaced that camaraderie in your retirement. Let’s talk about that tinge of loneliness and how you manage it.
Who Am I—I Should be Able to Answer That.
April 6, 2020, 7:00 pm EST
Are you still stumbling when people ask you what you do? Is it hard to say you are retired? Do you believe that others will think less of you? Do you just know that society writes a different story for men of a certain age playing golf than women of the same age working on a charity luncheon, playing bridge or golf? Do you want to remind everyone who you were but stumble when talking about who you are? How have you been presenting yourself when someone says, “And, what do you do?” Let’s complain a little about the unfairness of perception and share.